your thong is hanging out like whoa
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Randomize
