I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
