yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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