Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
