ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
it's like heaven, but drunker
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
All the doctor said was why
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
