Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
