don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
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his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
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This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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