where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
