Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
