hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
