i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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