Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
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