why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
