therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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