well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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