this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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