Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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