he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
