I've blown a few things in my day
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
