you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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