How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
