Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
