we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
