so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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