sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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