"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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