A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
