in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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