Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
