Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize