perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
