My room smells like vodka and shame
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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