im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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