I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
