dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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