so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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