ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
