Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
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