It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
