Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
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