i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize