Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
