Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
