i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
