dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize