I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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