Me. At least after what I've been through.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
