4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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