All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Floor bacon is actually really good
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
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