is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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