Swine flu. Run for my life!
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
