The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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